开开会？也不错

Ask anyone what they like about meetings and they'll tell you instead why they hate them.

For 15 years, John McKay, a mechanical engineer, worked at a consumer-products company where they held so many meetings he ended up an expert, categorizing them under nine labels, summed up in a 1,820-word document. They ranged from critical meetings, which are 'the vast minority,' he says, to travel-inspired ones, for people who 'don't like video conferencing because it would spoil their travel plans.'

'It became drudgery,' says Mr. McKay.

But then he joined a new company where there were almost no meetings. 'I began to miss all those meetings,' he admits. 'When you come out of it cold turkey, you realize you had a lot of human contact.' Nowadays, he would look forward to a three-hour meeting, he says. He even tries to involve himself in projects that will bring 'more of that contact.'

Mr. McKay's confession helps answer the question of why, if everybody hates meetings so much, do we have so many of them?

Early manuals on meetings warned against late arrivals, early departures, falling asleep -- and spitting. (Hence, the notion of spewing.)

Today, with at least the latter offense vanquished we can focus on the fact that we are, by nature, needy huddlers and cuddlers. The same person who disparages meetings -- an exercise as easy as shooting fish in a barrel -- sometimes secretly thinks they can be productive, can be a totem of status or, at the very least, can be a great forum for their latest joke material. They can also change the day's tempo -- if only by introducing cinnamon buns.

Surprisingly, a study to be released later this year shows a great number of meeting moaners are total fakers.

Steven Rogelberg, a professor of industrial organizational psychology at the University of North Carolina, Charlotte, and a group of colleagues found that among people surveyed about their last meeting, 69% rated them at least 'good,' while only 16% rated them 'poor' or worse. And although 50% said they complained about meetings, more than 60% of these complainers admitted that they either 'don't mind them that much' or 'enjoy them.'

Asked what their ideal work day would look like, two-thirds of respondents said it would include at least one or more meetings.

The disparity between public distaste toward meetings and private affection is likely due to the stigma attached to admitting you like them. It's declaring yourself either a show-off or a sheep -- and definitely a time-waster. 'If you say that you dislike meetings, you're able to latch on to this rugged individualism,' Prof. Rogelberg says.

It takes a brave soul like Norm Zwail, founder of an apparel business, to profess his meeting affection, although it still gives the impression that someone spiked the Poland Spring. 'I feed off the energy produced when eyes meet and laughter is heard, and the electricity generated when an idea is universally accepted, especially when it is my idea,' he says. 'Plus, I love to talk, be seen and be heard.'

Just talking about a meeting -- even if it's a gripe -- signals you rated an invitation in the first place. It's 'another way to show how important you are,' says Karen Tracy, a professor of communication at the University of Colorado, Boulder.

Prof. Tracy has studied pre-meetings, which she says are crucial to the organization and the individual. After all, the time before the official business begins often is more interesting than the agenda, and the friendly chatter reminds you why you like someone.

Joe Adams, an insurance agent, can't recall meeting topics. 'But I do remember the people I talked to,' he says. Formerly in an HR department where all he did was meet, 'I learned long ago that I am not going to meet myself to greatness.' But he has also learned to love the 'productive downtime' of meetings to make his own to-do lists.

'The drive for social connection is a very strong one,' says Nicholas Epley, an assistant professor of behavioral science at the University of Chicago's Graduate School of Business. Sitting in a cubicle is 'stupefying' and isolating, only intensifying a social need.

David Mazel, a research analyst, thinks people like meetings because 'you can stay busy without accomplishing a thing.' He says 'having gone to the meeting is the work.'

At one meeting he attended on ballistic-missile defense, the colonel conducting the meeting began by announcing the date of the next gathering and its refreshments. No marching orders emerged.

'The idea that we might actually do something for the nation was not a concern,' Mr. Mazel says.

Meetings actually are better than work, adds Tom Landis, probably because he is president of a restaurant company that caters meetings. 'Meetings are held because, while people detest them, they hate actually working more,' he notes.

Steve Crippen, who heads a manufacturing company, can tell whenever there has been a meeting at one of his customers' companies because he'll receive as many as a dozen calls from its attendees asking for the same information. 'They're looking for an opportunity to go to the next meeting and say, 'Well, I talked to them, and I got this done.''

随便找个人，问问他喜欢开会吗，他都会告诉你他讨厌开会，而且还会列出一大堆理由。

约翰•麦凯(John McKay)是名机械工程师，他曾在一家消费品公司工作了15年。公司大小会议无数，以致于他自己最后都变成会议专家了。他把会议分为9类，还撰文1,820字进行了总结。他说，会议五花八门，有些属于重要会议，但这类只有“极少数”；有些则属于“旅行爱好者”型，那些人不愿意召开电话会议，只是因为他们惦记着旅行计划。

麦凯说，公司的会议变得很乏味。

之后，他跳槽到另外一家公司，那里几乎从不开会。他承认自己开始怀念以前那种会议不断的时光，当你一个会都没有的时候，就会意识到从前开会时可以进行很多人际交往。他说，现在他会热切期盼为时3小时的会议。他甚至试图让自己参与到开会更多的项目中去。

麦凯的说法有助于回答这样一个问题：如果人人都如此讨厌开会，为什么还要开那么多的会？

早期的会议守则禁止迟到早退、打瞌睡、或是吐口水（当然也包括呕吐）。

今天，至少这些禁令都不复存在了，我们能关注这样一个事实：人类天生就是群居动物。对会议不屑一顾（这太容易了）的人私下里有时也会想，会议也可以是有益的，能体现身份，或者至少为交流新的笑料提供了一个不错的场所。如果会上还提供肉桂面包的话，还能改变一天的节奏。

出人意料的是，今年晚些时候将要公布的一份报告显示，很多嘴巴上说不喜欢开会的人其实都是假装的。

广告北卡罗来纳大学工业组织心理学教授史蒂文•罗格伯格(Steven Rogelberg)和同事进行了一项研究，让一组被调查者对最近开的会议给出评级，有69%的被调查者给的评级至少是“好”，只有16%的人给了“糟”或更差的评级。虽然有50%的人对开会怨声载道，但其中有超过60%的人承认他们要么“并不是那么在意开会”，要么“享受开会”。

当被问到一个理想的工作日应该有什么内容时，有2/3的被调查者表示，至少要包括一个甚至更多的会议。

人们如此的“表里不一”──在公开场合表示嫌恶而私下里却很喜欢，可能是因为觉得承认喜欢开是种耻辱。因为这等于向人们宣告，你要么是个喜欢炫耀的人，要么就是个胆小鬼，而且毫无疑问是个不珍惜时间的人。罗格伯格说，如果你说不喜欢开会，你就能显示自己有个性。

像服装公司创办人诺姆•齐威尔(Norm Zwail)这样公开承认喜欢开会是需要勇气的，尽管这仍让人感觉动机不纯。他说，他喜欢大家目光相触、放声大笑时产生的能量，以及观点（特别是自己的观点）被大家接受时感受到的“电流”；而且，他喜欢说话，喜欢受到大家的注目，喜欢别人聆听自己的看法。

仅仅是谈论会议，即使是抱怨开会，都显示出你觉得开会是有意义的。科罗拉多大学传媒教授凯伦•特雷西(Karen Tracy)说，这是显示自己重要性的另外一种方式。

特雷西一直从事会前研究，她说这对整个组织以及个人都至关重要。毕竟，正题前的闲聊时间常常比会议日程本身更加有趣，而且态度友好、和你聊天的人也会让你更加明白自己喜欢某人的原因。

保险经纪乔•亚当斯(Joe Adams)记不住会议的主题，但他却记得和他聊天的人。他从前在人力资源部工作，每天的事情就是开会。他说，他很早以前就已经认识到开会是无法使自己成就辉煌的。但他也学会爱上开会这种“可以开小差”的时机来干“私活”。

芝加哥大学商学院的行为科学助理教授尼古拉斯•埃普利(Nicholas Epley)说，人们有非常强的社交需求。在工位上坐着令人麻木、与世隔绝，只会让人更加渴望社交。

研究分析师大卫•马泽尔(David Mazel)认为，人们喜欢开会，因为这样能保持忙碌状态，而不需要完成具体的任务，去开会本身就是你的工作。

在他参加过的一个有关弹道导弹防御系统的会议上，主持会议的上校上来先宣布了下次会议的时间和提供些什么点心，而没有提出任何具体的任务。

马泽尔说，大家并不关心我们能为国家做点什么实事。

汤姆•兰蒂斯(Tom Landis)说，开会实际上比工作要好，可能是因为他本人就是为会议提供送餐服务的餐馆老板。他指出，虽然人们讨厌开会，但更讨厌工作，所以人们选择了开会。

某制造企业的首席执行长史蒂夫•克瑞朋(Steve Crippen)说，他能判断客户什么时候要开会，因为他会收到十几个人打来问询电话，提的问题都一模一样。他们都希望能在下次会议上有机会说：“我和他们谈过了，这事我已经搞定了”。